Something I recently realized that helped me understand my aro-spec identity is that my "crushes" that I can remember weren't actually fueled by romantic attraction for the person. They were actually fueled by attraction towards the idea of dating/liking them, but not actually them as a person. I wanted to find my soulmate and as soon as I found someone that I thought fit that ideal, I would start daydreaming about being with them, but I wasn't really attracted to them as a person, just my idealized version of them and the relationship. As a result, I couldn't really name any traits about those people that I liked, aside from surface level ones like, "funny," "nice," and "hardworking." And while I was aesthetically attracted to them, I never really fantasized about kissing them or being super romantic with them (aside from maybe hand-holding or hugging), and if I ever tried, it made me uncomfortable and felt like I was violating them. Did anyone else have a similar experience or is it just me?
rb to have a very gay 2022
Trans ftm are valid
Trans mtf are valid
Enby peeps are valid
Intersex peeps are valid
Feminine enbys are valid
Masculine enbys are valid
Androgynous enbys are valid
Feminine trans men are valid
Feminine trans women are valid
Masculine trans men are valid
Masculine trans women are valid
Lesbians are valid
Gay people are valid
Bisexuals are valid
Trans people are valid
Queer people are valid
Asexual people are valid
Aromantic people are valid
Aroace people are valid
Pansexuals are valid
Omni peeps are valid
Genderfluid peeps are valid
Agender peeps are valid
Genderqueer peeps are valid
Demisexuals are valid
Demi boys are valid
Demigirl are valid
Aceflux are valid
Aroflux are valid
Acchileans are valid
Neptunic peeps are valid
Bigender peeps are valid
Designer peeps are valid
Enbian peeps are valid
Fluid flux peeps are valid
Hypersexual peeps are valid
Peeps with autism are valid
Peeps with ADD/ADHD are valid
Neurodivergent peeps in general are valid
LGBT folks are valid
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Maps are not valid
Transracial people are not valid
Super straights are not valid
Please correct me on any wrong information or any flags you’d like to see in there
Or if I should take down the not valid stuff
PLS GIVE ME FEEDBACK
Am I the only aroace-spec person who read a lot of fanfic when I was younger, but instead of inserting myself into the reader insert stories, I would just insert one of my characters or a random OC that was similar to me but not the same, bc it felt weird to put myself into those situations?
Or was that just me?
I want a relationship that is completely undefinable by any existing labels or words. Like, we're so close and we hug and kiss each other's foreheads and cuddle and travel and explore together, and we get along so well and have so much in common. But at the same time, our relationship isn't fully romantic or fully platonic; it's a completely separate, open-to-interpretation thing that we tweaked as needed, and we have our own boundaries and things we are and aren't comfortable with, and we respect each other in every way, shape, and form.
My favorite Spider boy ❤️❤️❤️
edgy emo guy with long hair, jewelry, and dark clothes
alright maybe nobody will get what i'm talking about but writers, what's your character type? what's that one brand of character who is in EVERY SINGLE WIP YOU EVER HAVE. mine's the serious badass older-sister-figure with a blonde pixie cut
donna tartt: literally writes an entire 600 page book about how it can be dangerous to do things just for the aesthetic
us, already making pinterest boards: oh to be a classics student in vermont in the 80s drinking whiskey from a teacup and occasionally murdering people
Idk if I'm the only aro-spec person who is like this, but I need to talk about it bc it's been on my mind so much lol
So, like...in general, I have a complicated relationship with romance. In fiction (books/movies/tv/fanfic), I only really like queer romance. Two guys? All for it! Two girls? All for it! NB person with someone else? All for it! Granted, there will always be exceptions and romance stories that I prefer more than others, but by large, I tend to enjoy most queer romance stories that I consume. HOWEVER, for some strange reason, when it comes to straight romance stories, I almost always get squicked out or uncomfortable!! AND I HAVE NO IDEA WHYYYY!!! Like, it could be nearly identical to a queer romance story, but I would still be uncomfy if it was heterosexual, and I don't know why!!!!!!
When it comes to irl romance, I'm usually either indifferent or uncomfortable with it, no matter if it's queer or straight. Like, I can usually handle it, unless they're full on like making out or smth, then obviously, I'm extremely uncomfy and averse, but if it's casual, then it's just whatever.
But, honestly, I don't know what my deal is with the fictional romance!! I've even forced myself to like some straight romance in the past, but it's always SO forced.
So, yeah, that's how I feel. Can anyone else relate, or is it just me??
All Our Hidden Gifts by Caroline O'Donoghue! I had never heard of it when I picked it up from B&N, but I ended up loving it and reading the whole series! To this day, it's still one of my favs
As a person who is dying for book recommendations: What is a book you picked up randomly that you heard nothing about previously that blew you away?
I feel like we all have at least one hidden gem we stumbled upon.
Please reblog with your books in the tags :)
they/he, genderfluid nb, aroace, intersectional feminist, agnostic atheist | i like reading, matcha lattes, anime, Hellaverse stuff, marine life, and drawing, among other things
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