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Bob Belcher - Blog Posts
Louise Belcher!! ignor how i spelt her name wrong
starting a new series of songs that remind me of linda and bob belcher.
pt1
I Guess That’s Why They Call It The Blues - Elton John
happy valentine’s day to the two people who have a love i wish i could have one day<3
guYS SO IM VISITING HOME RIGHT AND ON THE WAY WE DRIVE PAST A CAR AND AT A QUICK GLANCE LIKE SIDE PROGILE I SAW SOMEONE WHO LOOKED LIKE BOB WITH HIS FAVE JACKET LIKE 100% THOUGHT IT WAS HIM BUT IRL AND I SCREAMED AND WE MADE EYE CONTACT 😭
gardener bob and thanksgiving bob are just a couple of my fave bobs :’)
pov: tina belcher’s fantasy
i’m back bitches and in my bob’s burgers brainrot era
January 9th is a Holiday!
As much as I love this theory and would 100 percent be for it, I’m just not sure. I just feel if Ginger were the Pesto kids’ mom there would be slightly more dialogue evidence linking us towards it.
I also feel there would of been more evidence for Jimmy specifically being bitter about the Belchers causing his divorce when I don’t remember any atm.
Closest I could think is from “Prank You For Being a Friend”. This line really stood out to me.
Jimmy Pesto: Bob, your wife’s here to see how stupid you look and probably divorce you.
Adding the divorce part of his zoom was so unnecessary to the situation and honestly felt kind of personal. Sure he could just be regular bitter that Bob is still married while he isn’t and not “f you in particular” bitter because they were responsible for Ginger leaving him.
Regardless of how much evidence it has though, I will take it as my headcanon too until the show makes its move on the whole situation. The fanart is awesome regardless.
A few days ago my partner proposed the idea of Ginger and Jimmy Pesto's ex wife (Jimmy Jr, Andy, and Ollie's mom), being the same person.
And listen, I have been FIXATED ever since.
Have we ever seen Jimmy in the restaurant at the same time as Linda being on the phone to Ginger?
What if that's why Jimmy's such a dick to Bob, because Linda's still in Ginger's life but he isn't?
Ginger's hair and shirt colours are almost identical to Jimmy Junior and Andy, respectively.
Ginger has a partner and Jimmy Jr's museoem says "my mom's new friend Allen, is okay!"
Andy and Ollie's personalities overlap with Linda's so much, that comes from somewhere!
Linda's mystery red-headed friend in the Dreamatorium episode has an almost identical face to Andy and Ollie too! And as J-Ju looks exactly like his dad, it stands to reason that the twins would look like their mom.
Reblogs greatly appreciated!
My Updated Belcher Kids, Zeke, and Jimmy Jr. Job Headcanons
After "What About Job" I became inspired to update the job headcanons. I know Bob is one of the most unreliable narrators in the show, but it's still the closest thing to canon I'm going to get for now so I'm going to tweak my headcanon a bit to slightly fit what Bob hypothetically thinks might happen. Tina: She went to get a degree in literature at community college. I still think she'll be an author of trashy romance novels, but now I like to think she'll also own a small, (sometimes) peaceful farm by the beach. It just has plants to start out with but it will have horses eventually too (sorry Tina, no going big XD). Bob comes by to help Tina with her plants every now and then. They both enjoy the bonding experience. I also didn't say who she married in the original job headcanon post because I thought it would be better if I left it up to interpretation. Screw ambiguity though, Tina is married to Zeke. He helps out when he can and he got some of his family to work at Tina's farm as well. Part of the plants she grows is for Bob's Burgers while the rest is for selling at the farmers' market. Gene: I'm going with he will become a traveling musician, but I still say he got his start by doing miscellaneous things on Bob's Burgers equivalent to YouTube like in the original post. He travels with Courtney and Alex I'm leaving their relationship up to interpretation because I'm fine either way I just think they are cute all together.
Louise: Has trouble finding herself at 18 but eventually decides to go to community college for chemistry. She started out just wanting to do a field that would help her make explosives. However, she later realized that cooking was just chemistry and she started specifically learning food chemistry. She knew in her heart she wanted to keep her family's business alive and used the knowledge she learned to help experiment on alternative burgers and other food they could sell. She's platonic friends and roommates with Rudy. Rudy works at Bob's Burgers as well, he provides the smoothies and suggestions for allergy-free options for the place. Zeke: He didn't have the means to afford college so he decided to join the navy for action, adventure, and money. They rejected him due to his ADHD though. To make matters worse his dad kicked him out at 18. So he offers to work at Bob's Burgers for a place to sleep as payment until he figures out what to do with himself. Zeke becomes part of the family really fast and Bob is happy to have him as his pupil in the upstairs kitchen. Zeke was still sad that he wouldn't be able to see the world like he hoped if he joined the navy. While he still couldn't join the navy, Teddy did offer to help Zeke at least get a captain's license through his connections. Zeke accepted the offer because it sounded cool to be an official captain if he ever actually had a chance at owning a boat. So during that time he balanced getting his captain's license, working at the restaurant, and earning whatever he could so he could go to culinary school. After he earned his captain's license, he is approached by Mr. Fishoeder (who was probably one of Teddy's connections in the first place) and he offers him a job to captain his booze cruise (which is also totally not used for smuggling anything illegal under the captain's nose, no sir!) at the sexy, adult, night hours on the Wonder Wharf. Not what Zeke had in mind when he got his license but he loved to party and thought it could be fun mixing drinks. Thinking of the chaotic memories that could be made sounded appealing as well. Zeke still works at Bob's Burgers when Louise takes over the restaurant. Louise, Rudy, and Zeke all workshop burgers and food ideas but Zeke is the final decision on if the food is worthy to be sold or not (Louise can never be trusted after the bubblegum burger incident even after studying food chemistry XD) So in the day, he works at Bob's Burgers and Tina's farm while at night he is the party animal captain of the Wonder Wharf booze cruise. Jimmy Jr.: Nothing has changed for him. I still say he's a dance teacher. I don't really have anybody I ship him specifically because none really stand out much. Douglas obviously has a thing for Josh so that's out, I don't want Becky Krespe to give JJ another chance, and while I think the concept of JocelynxJimmy Jr is hilarious, I don't think they would work out. So I'm flexible with whatever as long as it's legal.
Anyway, that's all. This all started because I couldn't brush off what Bob thought Zeke would end up doing. I figured I might as well update all of them after that. Yeah, I know the writers needed at least one person with a boat for the "Children of Men" parody but it's still funny out of all the characters he could have chosen, he picked Zeke.
"So uh, Legoshi from Beastars, what can I get you today?"
could someone, anyone, PLEASE make some calvin fischoeder/bob belcher content, I crave more but there's only around 20 fics☹️☹️. there needs to be wayyy more of these two they have sm potential 😔😔😔
Huskerdust is so Linda and Bob Belcher. Like the over the top and weird + grumpy and weird is such a beautiful thing. Like they love each other with all of their being even when they fight, true equals.
they ate so hard in this
guys brilliant au idea but i cant draw so if anyone who can draw sees this feel free to draw smth based off it
its vaguely like the fresh meat au except bob and linda get arrested. hear me out.
the family is still technically a cannibal family but the kids dont know. bob and linda put human meat in the burgers, all their food, they kill and slaughter people, but the kids have no idea this is happening. when tinas 11 (genes 9, louise is 7), bob and linda get arrested for killing people and eating them. the kids are then in and out of orphanages and the streets, and tina has to spend some time in a hospital because of mental illness, but eventually mickey and the other carnies take them in for good. the au takes place two years after the show does (louise is 11, gene is 13, tinas 15 in high school), and the kids are trying to lead normal lives in carniapolis.
individual characters
mickey - their main father figure, the kids live in his trailer, hes still a sort of sketchy guy but has a fairly stable job and loves the kids, a really good guy, not very different from the show but is more worried about the kids now, especially tina because she remembers everything
louise - big goof, kind of a hooligan, wears pajamas pretty much everywhere, still wears her hat, a lot less socialized, curses way too much, has a lot of flashbacks of her parents in her nightmares, sleeps really poorly, a lot more messy, starts play fights a lot more, still close with rudy when she comes back to middle school, clings to tina and misses her at school, all the kids are fluent/semi-fluent in a couple of languages but because she's been speaking spanish since she was seven, she speaks in mostly spanglish now, punk and 2000s emo fan, same sorta relationship with mickey that she had with linda, her parents kind of feels like ghosts that never even had the respect to haunt her
gene - a lot like louise he is also a little more punkish, only eats junk food, sisters have to force him to shower, still plays his little casio but its a lot more decorated and falling apart, kept one of lindas scarves and wears it everywhere he goes, snores loud as FUCK, even worse at reading rooms, met alex and courtney and are close with both of them, also knows spanish but is also fluent in russian because of a carnie named Georgi (doesnt exist but i made them exist), he picked it up so fast!! (ref to eugene mirman), listens to classic hiphop and jazz, close with mickey in the way he was close with bob, remembers his parents fairly well but feels more upset theyre gone than mad at what they did
tina - pretty similar to her original character, just more emotionally muted, like similar to the first seasons but maybe more angry, pretty blank and silent until shes around her siblings, then she gets more animated and seems a bit happier, remembers all of it the most, learned to be a really good fighter, incredibly strong but too thin, gives most of her food to louise and gene, very messy oversized clothes, sweaters and jewelry she made herself, cries in her sleep, when she goes back to school (she's the last to do so), all her old friends (jj, zeke, jocelyn, tammy, susmita, etc.) sit next to her silently and act like she was always there (shes so grateful they never treated her differently even after everything), knows a lot of languages, fluent in english and spanish very good at mandarin knows a little bit of italian and knows every russian curse word, listens to riot grrrl and old hippie rock mickey showed her, very close with all the carnies, especially a lady named Bernie (also does not exist in canon, i made her up), remembers everything, still loves her parents more than anything, just wants them back in her life
bob and linda - in prision, rotting like the people they killed, as much as i love them in canon, this version of them deserves to rot
you ever realize your problems are so much worse than you thought before
like i’ve thought i was a bad person since i was 10. what’s up with that
anyways what if tina was actually hugo’s daughter instead of bobs? random angsty headcanon. clashes with my headcanon that tina and bob look extremely similar, but who says you have to make sense
Bob's Ask Time! Gut reaction or thoughtful response: You decide!
favorite business owner
favorite carnie
favorite student
favorite teacher
favorite unaffiliated
business owner: edith and harold. joint package. i love them so much. they always make me giggle and they do genuine care about the belcher family as much as they pretend to hate them
carnie: mickey. enough said.
student: jocelyn or sam. i love jocelyn like the stupid blonde stereotype is so fire
teacher: ambrose or labonz. both make me laugh so hard but labonz also really cares about her students. ambrose and frond need to make out fr
other than the belcher, nat or trev are probably my favorites. they’re so silly and queer and i love them
gene - flower boy(for the aesthetic, especially garden shed)/wolf(for the storytelling, loves storytelling hip hop/rap)
tina - igor /call me if you get lost (big fan either way, is known to play balloon or find your wings whenever she has aux)
louise - chromakopia/cherry bomb/goblin (huge fan in general though)
linda would like his melodies but not listen to the lyrics at all, bob would say he hates it and then cry to like him when hes drunk <3
sorry hugo stans i cant fucking stand that bitch! also logan, sorry i really dont get the hype.... i am also not a louigan shipper. i am sorry mutuals.
5 days until its not weird for me to watch bob actually three times in one day!!!!! <3
reminder that there is a timeline in which bob belcher is a famous, incredibly hot, himbo of a secret agent (code name duchess) with retrograde amnesia who is a stepdad to the kids for 2 months, doesn't know tinas name, speaks russian and kills 4 KGB agents in the restaurant, running away from the family so they don't get killed. he then immediately forgets them. just putting out the fact that the kids watch their dad kill 4 people in front of them and never see him again <3
its been so long (like less than a week) since ive burger posted so here we go: headcanon list guys!
also cw - mentions of mental illness/trauma
bob : very much based off my own dad (one of my favorite people alive), bisexual, autistic depressed and clinically anxious, lies on the floor a lot because of back problems, works through injury and illness (the family's doing a bit better on money now but he's lived his whole life in fear of being unable to support the people he loves and their wellbeing), saw that tina aligned herself with femininity from when she was a really little kid (supports her endlessly, was the first one to buy her a dress), gives the kids his old records/cassettes/cds, quality time is his love language, loves crappy old movies from the 80s (like weird science), winona ryder was his childhood crush, tina shows him phoebe bridgers and he loves her (cries to kyoto bc dad issues), so desperately trying to not become his father, dreams about his mom a lot, has been getting gray hairs since he was 17 (purely from stress), bad episodes of insomnia, claims he doesn't mind being away from linda (if shes not in the same room as him for more than an hour he needs to cry, she is his absolute best friend), really adores teddy like a stupid younger brother, fucking hates mr frond with a burning passion
linda : truthfully i dont have much for her. i dont need to really give her any headcannons i worship her the way she is, but shes def adhd and autistic
gene : genderfluid (he/she), audhd, live laugh love fiona apple, bad sensory issues, cant wear pants unless theyre baggy, sisters buys him reusable earplugs, got linda's family's loudness, talks shit WAY too loud, jazz bitch, can surprisingly do a cartwheel really well, walks around belting 90s music (everyone hates it except lin), loves makeup and looks amazing in it (tina is secretly really pissed that he looks better in it than her), can fall asleep anywhere, will eat anything once, has bit alex/courtney as a form of affection (tina and louise too but theyre used to it), will sit on tinas floor and vent to her at any given moment, remembers nothing except for the most obscure random things about the people he loves, incorporates music in all of his school reports, loves salty food especially
louise : unlabeled (she/they), autistic, loves japanese candies and snacks, phone screen chronically cracked, permanently cold hands, tina does her hair, makes own jewelry and pins, loves broaches and mints but always forgets which is in which tin, has drank paint water by accident, very artistic, loves to draw in comic book/manga styles, secretly really enjoys being around jimmy jr (finds him really funny), loves a good ironic trucker hat, if you can read this the bitch fell off, needs glasses (ends up getting funky ones like lindas), short fingers that are always painted light green and pink, lots of scars on hands from skateboarding, learns bass later in life, starts saying "oh my god" like bob
tina : transfemme (she/her), autistic/has clinical anxiety and depression, speaks with the most subtle new york accent (residual from linda), multilingual (fluent in spanish, conversational in french, knows some korean, can say random words in various others), loves bad campy horror movies, incredibly soft but always sweaty hands, layers her hair (learns to cut her own), because of everything thats happened she is extremely paranoid about family dying, sensitive skin, has a bunch of digestive issues (throws up a lot), sometimes has violent tendencies (feels guilty for them always), sleep walking/chronic nightmares (wakes up screaming a lot), watches drag race with bob, #1 phoebe bridgers/lucy dacus/julien baker fan, adores sleater-kinney, loves riot grrl music, bites nails, extremely clumsy (scars), loves big jackets over dresses, takes naps because she cant sleep at night, truly is her fathers daughter
i do not think anyone will read this whole thing, but i hope you like it if you did
What gift would your favorite character most like to receive and what would they give to their loved ones?
Oh my golly okay get ready for me to yap so I feel like it might depend on the person but since Tina loves to write friendfiction she would definitely be a notebook hoarder (like me) so if anyone got her a pretty journal i think she'd love it
also though like it depends on the person like linda might give her books that she recommends, bob would get her clothes in the style he liked as a kid or records he used to listen to, louise would get her manga she thinks tina would like (she named the chinchilla shinobu so maybe shes watched demon slayer idk!), gene would probably make her something like a song or something silly like that, and if any of her friends got her literally anything she'd be overjoyed
its basically canon that tina is the BEST gift giver so she would make or buy just super super personal items relating to inside jokes or personal experiences like she will remember everything you tell her about yourself. her favorite person to buy for is louise cause she knows just what to get her, but outside of the family probably sam cause he feels like one of those people that cries tears of joy whenever you get him anything
sorry for how long this is gang if youve read this far thank u <3 safe and happy holidays i hope you get everything you asked for and more!!! eat lots of treats and tell your family you love them!!