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Hc: Logan headbutts people in appreciation. He’s short, so it doesn’t hurt too bad. Just,
Kurt: good work out there man! *arms open for a hug*
Logan: mm. *bonk*
Kurt:
Logan:
Kurt:…thanks.
Logan: mm.
And then he walks away
FINALLY a Logan Evolution one. Might still use pieces of this to carve out the FBLAU.
The History of One James Logan Howlett
At Eight, it Happens.
The house had been decorated for a celebration. Even when he’s sick, which is often, his parents always try to entertain him, even if he’s stuck in a wheelchair so he doesn’t have to walk. He’s sick with the flu for the third time that year. He’s just standing up from bed to the chair when he hears-
BANG
And then a scream.
The fever makes the world melt around him as he breathes, but he stumbles out of his room towards the sound. He sees the groundskeeper on top of his father, and that’s it.
He killed two people that day, not one. His father, and his half-brother.
His babysitter, Rosie, whisks him away into the woods, names him Logan, but they’re both young, and the work is too heavy for a frail girl and her little brother. The worst happens to Rosie. She gets sick from all the stress and the snow, and by the spring, he’s with the wolves, learning how to live, forgetting his past by the day.
The government finds a little boy with blood still dripping down his mouth, deerskin as his only clothing. They send him to a home and he learns how to pretend to be a person, another animal pelt he slings over himself to appear less threatening.
Eleven finds him back in the woods, his most natural habitat. He sleeps in the trees, eats raw meat for the first time in years and feels alive. There is no need to pretend to be ghosts.
At thirteen, he begins to work with Wraith, Sabretooth, and is guided by a man called Maverick. (everyone knew Stryker was pulling the shots). They’re a team, and a good one. But something happens, and he starts to work alone.
Fourteen isn’t remembered. There is nothing special about the Wolverine.
Fifteen finds him isolated, in a little room in a little house. He’s on a mission he won’t remember, in a place that won’t matter. Somehow he gets a cupcake on his bed. He doesn’t know who it’s from, but he eats it anyway.
16 passes the same way. He is safe. He eats raw meat again. He gets another cupcake.
And 17 finds him running, running, running, running, no memory of anything except the pain and a blonde boy reaching out in fear and rage but everything seems wrong so he does what he does best and runs.
He’s all the way in the US by the time he realizes what he’s done.
You know what I think I’ll just call it that for now: the reverse AU shall henceforth be known as the Feral Baby Logan AU.
It would honestly make it a lot easier for the team to handle him. All the moods that look assholey on a middle-aged man just seem very…typical moody teenager.
Add the fact that they can literally scruff him, and there is plenty of comedic opportunity. TBH, Beast is probably the only one that can actually pick him up, but that probably doesn’t stop everyone else from trying.
SALEM, NEW YORK
I also like this AU because, in my opinion, this gets to the heart of why Logan likes Jean: She’s pretty and she’s nice to him.
In this AU, he probably has a little kid crush on her because she’s the first one to try and take care of him. Poor guy just doesn’t know that’s a thing friends can do because he learned about relationships from movies and radio dramas. And he forgot all about maverick and his Team.
another un-edited chunk, definitely gonna be a few more chapters into the fic but here yall go!
Feral Baby Logan AU
The first time they spar, though, it triggers a memory (and a subsequent panic attack). The Beast just holds his wrists, murmurs reassurances, and rubs his thumbs against the outside of Loans knuckles, uncaring of his claws. After that, they really do start to bond. So much so that it causes…some codependency issues in Logan when he has to be apart from His Person. But, that all comes later.
Wolverine manages to hound the Beast into (play) fighting with him. He’s been at the Institute for all of a week and already feels like he’s going to shake out of his skin from boredom.
Everyones treating him like he’ll break if he does any fighting at all, which is boring, and he has to eat all of his meat medium or more because everyone keeps staring at him and watching what he eats,which is annoying, and there's no one else in the building that's his age or anything to do, which is infuriating.
On top of all that, he’s been forced to meet with Jean Grey and Charlie every day for at least an hour. His head always hurts after, and the last few days have just been with Charle’s after Jean ran out to throw up in the hall bathroom. And that’s not mentioning the weird nightmares he’s been having these past few days, of people he doesn’t know holding him down, the loud cracking of the collar ringing in his ears even after he wakes.
All to say, if he doesn’t get this tension out soon, he's going to explode. Beast must have seen some of his distress on his face, because he sighs, takes off his reading classes, and nods.
“Alright boy, but you must remember some rules. One,” he holds up a large blue finger.
“If I say stop, we stop. Secondly, you may not use your claws. I know you like using them, but this is a spar, not a fight, and I do not heal as quickly as you do.” He grins. “But biting and your normal claws is allowed.”
Logan doesn’t waste a minute. The moment Beast steps into the ring, Wolverine pounces, a Feral grin in place as he jumps to climb the much larger man. He’s surprised when his weight topples the man, both of them sprawling into the mat. Beast huffs out a laugh, and then grabs him by his shirt and -gently- throws him over his shoulder onto the mat. Logan wheezes, but scrambles up, a grin on his face. This is going to be fun
It’s on their fourth round that it happens: Beast surprises him. He does something to quiet his steps enough for Logan to lose him as he jumps away to get some distance. He’s trying to locate him before he closes his eyes, and realizes the man is somehow behind-
Before he even finishes his though, he sees something blue and lashes out, claws immediately extended, managing to scratch Beasts shirt before-
Beast grabs him by the front of his shirt, lifting him from the ground. There’s a dangerous glint in his eyes, a rage. It’s now that Logan remembers how much larger and stronger this man is.
“Boy-”
A dozen voices overlap.
He’s not a boy, but everyone insists on calling him one. They love it in the lab, like he’s to stupid to understand what they're doing to him. Like he can’t understand when they rip his teeth out for attacking an essential catch, or fighting the doctors when they cut off his fingers and carve out his joints ‘for research’.
The man in front of him flicks through forms, brown hair then black then blond, hand growing larger and smaller, clawed-
And all Logan knows
Is a feeling of dread.
So he runs.
Claws retracted, he blindly swipes his arms, hearing a grunt of surprise as he's dropped like a sack of potatoes, and he's running off at a sprint before he can think.
He hears speech, more shouting, but it doesn’t matter. He has to get out.
His ears ring as he runs towards the only thing he can locate: his room.
He slams into door frames, shoves past a few taller kids, and launches himself into the most protected part of his room: the corner between his bed and his bedside table.
It's not until he's huddled in between them that he realizes he forgot to close the door
Fuck.
He’s dry heaving, trying to prevent himself from vomiting when he realizes it is his shirt that's choking him. He rips it off, the fabric feeling just like the collar-
no no he promised he could behave- they promised- please- he was sorry-
and gasps through flashes of pain, pressing his hands against his neck to prove it’s not there anymore, they didn't like to punish animals, weapons like that here.
“Logan?” Beast is standing in his open door
He wants to scream at him to go away, to leave, to get out of his room; this is the only place he’s safe. But all that comes out is a crackling whimper.
Hank sighs, and walks in.
Logan hisses, looking very frightening in the corner of his room. His hair is falling into his face, eyes flicking around the room, but only locking onto Hank as he crosses the threshold of the door. There’s dried blood on his neck, on his hands, on his chest. He hurt himself trying to get away.
Hank pauses, and then kneels. He crawls the rest of the room until he’s in front of Logan, who’s biting his lip so hard it keeps bleeding enough to drip down his chin.
Beast reaches a hand out slowly but steadily. He smells bloody. And nervous. But he doesn't smell mad. It doesn’t make sense.
Logan whines, eyes slamming shut as he feels his claws slowly pop out, trying to defend him despite his knowledge it would be useless. They scrape his neck, but he keeps his hands close to his ears.
Beast grabs his wrists firmly, and his blinks as he just
“C'mon son, you have to stop scratching, you’re just scaring yourself more” He guides his hands down. Once there in his lap, Hank scruffs him gently, one firm hand on his neck as the other one remains in Logan’s, thumb rubbing the edge of his claws.
It’s familiar.
Another memory, a breath whispered along the shell of his ear. A feeling of comfort
"C'mon runt, breathe.”
Hank echoes it, calling him son and counting out how long he's supposed to hold and then release.
He breathes
Hank's hand guides his face into the crook of his shoulder and something about the security, the safety of his room, the calm response of the doctor… the warmth of someone else cradling him.
Logan breaks.
His calmed breaths abruptly turn to sobs, and when Hank attempts to gently dislodge him (to see what he did wrong) he’s surprised by Logan clinging to him, hands shakily fisted in hims shirt, face smooshed into his neck, hard enough that Hank can feel the tears on his shirt.
And he does what no one else has done for him in years…
He stays.
He tells comforting lies, tells Logan he won’t be punished for hurting him, says they're never gonna put the collar on him again, that he’s safe, not just in his room, but in the whole mansion.
Even as Logan shakes apart, Hank's hands and breath stay constant, a lighthouse to Logan's hurricane.
When he's done crying, he pulls away, staring at the ground. He pretends like his nose isn’t dripping, and sighs.
“…Sorry.”
“It's alright, child. You are new here, and I know it is difficult to believe, but you are welcome to lean on any of us if you require assistance and support.”
In some part of his brain, Logan is screaming at himself
Child is even more infantilizing than a boy…there's no way he's going to let him call that.
But…
He noticed. He’s the first person to have noticed. And He’s the only person who hasn’t been scared of Wolverine the entire time he’s been here. So.. Beast gets a pass.
It takes a month or two for Logan to become attached to Beast. He’s a Doctor, and Logan Does Not like doctors. Seeing anyone in a lab coat means Experiments and Pain and Magnets. But when he sees the Beast destroying Sentinels to protects his students, roaring and baring his teeth and using all of himself to fight, well. Like recognizes Like.
Better yet, Hank is much more patient than any Doctor he’s had before. He asks before jabbing him with needles and cold metal stethoscopes and doesn’t even use the Collar to drag him around!
The first time they spar, though, it triggers a memory (and a subsequent panic attack). The Beast just holds his wrists, murmurs reassurances, and rubs his thumbs against the outside of Loans knuckles, uncaring of his claws. After that, they really do start to bond. So much so that it causes…some codependency issues in Logan when he has to be apart from His Person. But, that all comes later.
I imagine that in the Kid Logan AU, Hank Mccoy takes the role of an almost Father figure.
It's a reciprocal relationship, with Logan enjoying someone who can handle his Feralness and primal attitudes. With him, he can (almost) go all out and have fun play fighting, (and being scruffed doesn't sting as much if the guys almost two feet taller than you and built like a brick shithouse), and he can even bite him and know it won't get infected!
It also provides an opportunity for growth in Hank. When he says anything demeaning about the more...Beastly side of himself, it indirectly affects Logan. He doesn't see how Logan's face falls whenever he does, when the Doctor equates acting animalistic to being Less Than or Worse Than humans and mutants. The boy never says anything, but Hank catches on after Wolverine stops behaving so wildly around him.
(Once, after saying something so demeaning about his animalistic tendencies that Logan takes off for weeks, he buys himself parenting books. They help.)
I also just think it would be funny if the reason behind his little 'kitty ear' hair is that he gets head pats and it flattens the top of his hair <3
Another repost, planning to re-edit this and post it once I finish a few more chapters of my Feral Baby Logan AU, but here ya'll go! I'll be uploading what I have un-edited of this AU within the next few hours i think.
FBL: Logan reflects. (Angst, self hatred)
Here’s the thing about being a Feral child soldier:
Sometimes people don’t get it. They all look at him and pity him. He sees it in their eyes, smells it, sweating like they’re still teenagers, all waiting to see how the loner kid is gonna react.
Logan went to high school for a total of one week before the Weapon X scientists decided he was too wild to pretend and swapped him out for Victor
The thing is… he enjoyed it. Not all of it, obviously, thank fuck they got that collar off of him, and the tests he could do without. But… he misses the energy. He misses the violence. Hunting humans isn’t that different from hunting a moose. They can both kill you, but at the end of the day, they’re both easily trackable when they don’t know they're being hunted. And they always get tired first.
…
He’s killed a lot of people.
He’s felt their flesh give under his hands, tender stomachs give under the sharpness of his claws. He’s felt their sticky brain matter and fluids on his fingertips as he’s bashed their heads into walls. Moments, ragdolls, animals. That’s all they feel like in the moment. Prey he caught and slaughtered, as all prey is.
He knows the feeling of human blood, viscera in his mouth, the iron tang familiar on his tongue as he and Victor clear out rooms, entire bases of foreign militaries. When time stops moving, no sound besides the rhythmic dripping of blood from the body stuck in the ceiling. Nothing besides their panting, as they wait for the rest of their team.
He doesn’t realize how strange it is to feel that way until he hears the doctors. And then his Boss. And then the X-men. They all point it out as something wrong. And sure, he knows he has things to make up for, but really, This is what they get hung up on?
It’s like none of them have read his rap sheet.
(None of them have, except Xavier. They wanted to give him time to tell them. He will not know this until it is too late.)
He only really regrets two people he’s ever killed. Two children, belonging to an american politician.
(It’s what started the brainwashing, what motivated them to isolate him. If he didn’t remember, he wouldn’t worry about it. He didn’t need to doubt them. He didn’t need to think. All he had to do was fight for them.)
But now, with his feelings and his mind unlocked now he can’t help but feel sick when he thinks of them. Their little chubby faces, unblemished by time. Their thin, baby hair just growing out, the older ones quiet snores. They had slept together that night. It reminded him of his friends.
So he gets it a little, the way they look at him. The way Xaviers face goes gray whenever he tries to read Logan's mind. Pity and shame and disgust.
He gets it more when he has to hold Kurt after his first kill.
He understands it most when he has to face Victor again, when Victor has been stripped of himself and, like him Before, all that is left is Sabretooth.
i have the best/worst fanfic ideas I just read a summary about the x men, and Xavier sounds like a dick lol. That would be fun to play with. Have a moment, where Wolverine gets shot in the head.
Piercing white noise. Old fear of forgetting oh god oh god fuck no- Logan Wakes up to Xavier over him, talking to him. But he…remembers something. Fragments, memories, feelings. Xavier is manipulative. He is cruel. He is calculating. Someone's changed his memories. Someone's been in his head. So, in a moment of panicked fear, Wolverine slashes at Xavier.
Xavier falls to the ground, shaken, holding his hand to his chest, pulling away to see the blood gushing out. He screams for help and everyone starts attacking him.
But Wolverine doesn't care. So he attacks Xavier again, quickly and
Logan
snaps
his
neck.
He dies so many times that night.