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Jokes - Blog Posts
Dia 1 postando piadas sobre Ninjago
- O que o Nemo tem em comum com o Garmadon?
-Ambos não podem ser achados!
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭☠️
The conch is never wrong.
That feeling when you make the world's best joke but only people in the venn diagram of being in the Fandom and also enjoy classical literature will understand and everyone irl lies not in the middle.
Me and some coworkers one day, talking about getting maimed and amputated on the job: hey you know that scene in Pirates of the Caribbean when Barbosa detaches his prosthetic leg to drink out of
Us: haha that would be cool, we could have a peg leg like that too!
One of the guys: wait, keg leg!
Everyone: OMG KEG LEG
I'm chronically online but not in a "I know what goes on" kind of way, it's more like a "I can name every meme from 2000-2020" way
Hades from Hercules 🤝 Getting mad that your hot girl bestie is ignoring you to hang out with a 🤢GUY🤮 🤝 Me
Hades from Hercules 🤝 Getting mad that your hot girl bestie is ignoring you to hang out with a 🤢GUY🤮 🤝 Me
I manic pixie dreamed too close to the sun and all I got out of it was this panic disorder.
It's so weird it's called the 2023rd year of our lord when he died in 33, I dont think it's his year anymore
Trans person goes to the doctor
Doctor examines them
Doc: "I diagnose you with no boob disease"
Some man tried to sell me a coffin, a gravestone, and a funeral service.
I said those are the last things I need.
Tiktok I did for 200 followers
It's gonna be such a funny mess when Donald Trump dies of a stroke on April 1st, 2024.
Naturally everybody will think it's fake because of the date only to lose their minds (both positively and negatively based on their opinion of trump) when realizing it's real
There will be massive celebrations in the streets and on social media and lots of predictable "don't speak ill of the dead" discourse about those celebrations
Weird evangelicals will pull some weird number trick talking about how Jesus was conceived on April 1st and that makes Trump a sort of messiah and people will make fun of that
The Republicans (after they're done with the faux-sadness and faux-outrage) will stomp over each other to be his successor but none of them will succeed. They'll tear each other apart and have no single nominee for the November elections.
There will be discourse about if Biden and the living former presidents should go to his funeral (they won't, he was a traitor insurrectionist)
The Ukraine-Russia War immediately goes in favor of Ukraine as morale in the Kremlin is reduced. China similarly backs off from its threats on Taiwan.
Ten thousand new memes are made, some sticking around for years to come.
Not a month later a bunch of unofficial biographies of Trump hit the bookshelves, many with new details about just how awful he was.
My friend David had his ID stolen the other day now we just call him Dav
don’t be homophobic, be homophilic.
#chemistryjokes #i think
When you saw that there were only three sets of footprints in the sand, it was because you were being carried by me, and you, and Zoboomafoo. 👣👣👣
Power Outage #104 The Moon
Extras Below!:
Power Outage #103 The Sun
Extras Below!:
Power Outage #102 Fish or Eye?
Alternates!:
Moonpaw Sketch. Moonpaw is owned by Karina, or @dilfosaur on Tumblr.
When I saw OneBadNoodle’s Love design I just had to draw it!! They’re soooo adorable!!! Please check OneBadNoodle out!! @onebadnoodle
Alternates Below!:
Power Outage #101 ….I Love Moonpaw….
(Moonpaw is owned by Karina)
Alternates Below!:
@dilfosaur @drawfee
Power Outage #100 Cursed Cat Vox!!
(You’ve heard of Cursed Cat Alastor, but have you heard of Cursed Cat Vox?)
More Doodles Below!:
Power Outage #99 Puppies In Pajamas!?!?!
I drew this in the car a few while listening to the “Stuff You Missed In History” podcast a few months back. I think one of the hosts yelled this while reading listener mail.