Naruto 2

That’s what I would unironically do if I was ever to talk with human russian female

Seriously, I don’t have the heart left for these things.

new comic! 😀 meeting face to face

How do I make this transformation without remaining even more sociopathic-lookin’

Has me

Liking breasts remained my personality trait throughout my life?

I’ve really gotta change things.

I’m gonna be more mature.

My Justice in Andrism Lifestyle and My worldview.

I respect women as human beings. If they’re nothing I don’t remember their names.

I am incel, ultimate incel. But I don’t particularly like to socialize with normies, to be honest I plan on investing into mosques and Islam. As well as anything that is detrimental harm to my enemy. Justice is fear and fear of inadvertently ability of yourselves, I respect the battle royale teacher thing.

You are spoiled. You hate your parents. You get mad when people offer good advice like dont be transgender, your groomers wheeze at righteousness, the idea of doing something without pay, that is what your meritocracy forms. Black hate.

Indeed, I agree with you. You deserve to be livestock breed, a kine. Because fear is not righteousness. Fear of consequence is by which you created morality, and so forth you will enforce me as the moral king. I am not competing, I do what I ought to believe just. I don’t want to live in Meritocracy. I don’t want to play the game.

Mic dropped, goodbye.

The camera sticker that I bought doesnt want to stay on top. Yahoo! I am 21 years old tomorrow.

Aaaaah

I can’t explain one big thing that I hate

I really hate eating. I googled so many diseases but I cant explain the urge to lazy around and for hours to avoid the “responsibility” consciously.

I can work hard! I can! And sure, I need to get used to it but then…. Oh… when at that small second I feel hunger and my mind contemplated for me to stop doing EVERYTHING, just to eat, my brain sadly says BIG NONO.

I start doing nothing and when confronted i avoid it like plaque, i will put on plate, right… go to kitchen, good idea. Then I will start walking! I really have problem with consuming food, there were multiple times back then especially starting 2019…insh at covid era somewhere then, but not so long ago either, i would have extreme fasting period of months…. That happened on multiple occasions, one of them was severe. I lost lots of calories but surprisingly my body didnt feel that different. You can be surprised how long you can survive without food given you dont waste all calories and carbohydrates and glycogen most important through intense workouts.

With more dormat turgor life, you can survive even without water for quite a bit.

I definitelt did back then…. Anyway, the past is over, sometimes I fear “wow w00t wasted all his lifespan hahaahah what” but seriously on average a normal person is far more efficient than I am at efficiency in life. Sometimes its hard to put “Ive done something this grand!”

But yes i need to go fucking eat. Proving the problem……….

Reminder that if you did not stop playing dark souls in 2020 or later in any time you would’ve become autistic tranny like picrel.

I guess this is what all pyromancer players transition to.

thought about the transgender bpd dark souls level up girlie again and got really irl sad at the concept of someone just walking away from her

lord of the rings and gooning are connected

gooning is like sauron think think man

today is worst day, i am off killing myself.

+

our existence and future is predetermined by variables around us.

some things that make you better, and some things that don't.

when I consider that I imagine I should just off myself today.

I got shock figuring out I am 22, not 21 years old. I lost track of time so badly I forgot that. I thought I was 21 and convinced myself. But I actually am 22 now. Wow, last 5 years of my life were hell. In fact, I'd say everything after 12 was already hell. It was empty void. That's why I really hate videogames, why did I spend so much time playing garbage like Dark Souls? Jesus. Uh... Fuck, I am 22 years old, holy shit I am fucked. It's time to think about my future priorities. a month in mental asylum then few years of absolute suffering and misery, anything after 2015 is blurry to me, I feel like I stopped existing as entity. I wasted a lot of time on social media, a lot of time chasing nothingness, things that possess no power in the world.

And now it's actually 2025?! My brain feels like nothing has been happening and I was genuinely rotting away. I am glad I managed to release some of these touhou videos, I am glad I managed to bring churro back. But everything in my spirit feels miserable, it's pretty obvious I am not cutout for humanity's methodology. I haven't made any friends nor any partner, I do not have any form of support at all. Not even one of family. And with my personality, with my way of being, I doubt I'll ever be able to get any. My ego is in shambles and anger as of right now. It's funny right? It's a small detail but if I said 21 it would have made me FEEL as if I accomplished a little of something. By taking a date one year further now it makes me feel like I am REALLY LATE. After all, I took a while to condition myself to the premise of "atmosphere", this is how "things are supposed to be or play out". I feel insignificant today and like the world is jusjt gonna step on me to death and there's nothing I can do. I am people pleaser, because i felt socially forced to act like one. Like that was a means of survival that I half-hazardly accepted while not feeling it in my heart. Now even complaining makes me feel like age is crawling as penalty for speaking words here. Indeed, nobody really cares. It's all fake, people only care about things that cost zero risk. Associating yourself with something weak makes you weak, isn't that right?

So, what will be my priorities for the rest of my life?

I am definitely alone and I am also not strong to defeat the world on my own, I am tired of ironyposting. I am fucking tired of watching shit youtube content. I am tired of social media hijacking my mind (when really i would've preferred living in a tribe than this fucking -technocratic place) well.. 1. I will try to work on churro as much as I can so this site works and I will use my finance to support it. Since I won't ever have a child, I can share it with the site. It can be costly for future servers and for advertising on whenever I can, but it is my genuine goal to both spend my time and money on the site. That said, I cannot do it while also working, because a few hours aren't enough to code any substantial changes or fix bugs. I will work on trying to take a gambit of perfecting the site while NEET at the moment. My second goal is touhouposting, I thought that I will have periods where I upload videos on youtube and continue doing it. Playing videogames might not be good way to spend free time, but nobody really liked me and I don't communicate so I feel this is better efficient way than all these times I tried making friends. I will probably upload touhou videos every 4 days if my time allows it, but I will eventually run out of time to edit.

So, the touhou thing isn't eternal, give it like 5 years maybe max, I hope to end it at 3. They will be published even if I die but they ought to be entertaining videos.

With that said, gym and training play huge role of my daily life. So that also takes a lot of time.

And procrastinating, I gotta talk about the worst. I am bad at dealing with abstract things, they waste my time more than anything. I am already a loser incel the way I am but when I deal with something that doesn't have a clear goal it will be bothering me. I need to manage my time so I spend the LEAST time on things that requrie entertainment over work. This stuff is something that is hard to fight when you got addicted to brainrot.

As for drawing, drawing is genuine effort workoholic example, so I priotize drawing in free time over meaningless conversations with people who only care about themselves anyway + doom feedscrolling (awful i hate it i am not gonna do it anymroe notgonnadoit My life looks pretty shady according to human standard, but I never went to bars or anything like that, in fact maybe its peopel who are shady and they have the majority. So, what do I do after I get churro perfect and upload all vids I wanted? hm....

yep, I'm probably gonna die. I wouldn't know anything anymore, it'd be nice to have son who would manage churro, maybe I can adopt somebody at very late age as ultra-cuck or something, I am getting tired of typing....

I have cut on my left arm that leaves this fold next to bicep.

When i train my left arm feels so heavy. This rash or whatever… came provably from mosquito. Well im fucked

I guess one more year neeting

I am demoralized if i cant even remain strong then whats the fucking point

I feel like starving today and few days ago might remove some of the weight gains, but getting lean is my goal. I might have sped up to extreme though, firstly i drink protein and then feel like almost dying, without enough water and carbs it is impossible for me to process glycogen enough, i don’t know medicine stuffs…. But if i eat carbs i still need to be in calorie deficit, one way or another i will be getting skinnier, all that monthly progress might jave been in vain.

But Ive heard one doesnt lose muscles quickly, I drink protein but I only eat light salad and very foods.

That said I feel headwise dizzy and its second time I remember messing up proportions of protein, drink too much and my head becomes hell, heart is aching feel like I’d die.

I’ve been reading higurashi so far and i am honestly going nuts with starvation, its definitely not good but ive eaten quite a bit too. Its confusing….. i have trained today either and I didnt yesterday barely, because i feel so little energy plus for most of day I had no access to containers of water because the water got boiled and therefore undrinkable. Having the pretaste of chocolate flavorsd protein left for so long without water feels disgusting. I can say that I probably have lost fat but it feels… ugh horrible and i dont know jow much muscle i lose since i javent trained today i am going to sleep tomorrow is sleep